REJOICE in confident hope. Be PATIENT in trouble and KEEP ON PRAYING. Romans 12:12
Then we opened the email together on the floor of Josiah's room while the kids (our two plus the two I babysit) calmly watched Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and ate yogurt tubes in the playroom. And by calmly I mean they were loud, yogurt was squirt everywhere, and Josiah (who started potty training that day) peed all over the pack and play he was quarantined in. Totally what you imagine when you think of how you see your child for the first time. Or not. When we saw his pictures (there's a LOT!! I've never heard of anyone getting as many pictures with their referral as we did) we did not have that immediate emotional reaction to him that you hear about. He wasn't 'ours' right away. We had prayed God would protect our hearts. That we wouldn't be immediately attached until after we had heard from the doctor.
When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I. Psalm 61:2
Quickly I realized that this wasn't going to be a simple "he looks great!" from the doctor. There are some possible complications. Our hearts turned from hopeful joy to a heartbreaking realization that this may not be our little boy and that he may become very sick. We never expected this. We never expected possible 'special needs' to hurt so bad. We never expected our referral day (or week) to be so hard. We prayed and cried and prayed. We asked for guidance and prayer from just a few close people. Those ladies that ministered to my heart that week are forever connected to us and our little boy's story. They emailed or texted daily, with verses, song lyrics, or devotionals. They called me to pray. They were in tears with us. At first through sadness and compassionate understanding, then through unbelievable joy. I don't want these days to cloud our referral story. I don't want them to make anyone think of our boy less than perfect and lovely and wonderful and am honestly embarrassed that I ever thought that. But, they all by themselves are a picture of God's peace. His glory. His redeeming story. And Gideon's adoption story-our life stories, together- wouldn't be complete without this part. God conquers fear. God makes "Reckless Love" possible. God has authored our story. God makes all things beautiful.
"But waiting on God without any concept of what the future holds cultivates in us the type of trust our God desires. How genuine would the trust be if we knew the outcome? God has proven Himself TRUSTWORTHY. We must prove ourselves TRUSTING." -TRUST, HOPE, PRAY by Luke and Trisha Priebe
WE HAVE A SON. His name is Gideon.
Well, not yet. But we will name him Gideon and then use his Ethiopian name as his middle name (we can't share his Ethiopian name online). He is 3 and a half months old and is teeny tiny. He is in our agencies smallest care center (in Eastern Ethiopia) where he is getting lots of one on one time. Since he is still so teeny tiny and in that froggy stage I can't find a good picture to crop so you can see his sweet hands or feet. We can't show you pictures of all of him online until we have passed court and he's officially ours. But, we'd be more than happy to show you a picture in person or via a private email/text! Addilyn and Josiah usually have a picture of him too that they'd be more than happy to show you. Basically, he's the cutest tiniest little Ethiopian you ever did see.
Do not be afraid, for I am with you.
I will gather you and your children from east and west. Isaiah 43:5
I have so much more to say about those days. So much more I could write on and verses and songs that truly helped us see God's heart but, some of that is far too personal. And the story really isn't in those hard days. The story is in what follows. The story is about God creating our family. About God caring for us and our children (ALL THREE!) more than I can even fathom. For now, will you pray with us? Praise God for adding to our family. Pray for our Gideon. For his health and for fast paperwork processing times. For our hearts to be patient and confident and trusting of God. Pray that we will get to travel to Ethiopia for court and meet Gideon this summer.
Thank you Thank you.
Let all that I am praise the Lord
with my whole heart, I will praise His holy name.
Let all that I am praise the Lord
May I never forget all the good things He does for me.
He forgives all my sins
and heals all my diseases.
He redeems me from death
and crowns me with love and tender mercies.
He fills my life with good things.
My youth is renewed like the eagle's!
Psalm 103: 1-5
